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I've decided
I now have to see V for Vendetta for three reasons
- James Wolcott
called
it brilliant and I cop to the fact that it's rather sheepish
of me to change my mind based on another's opinion but Wolcott
is well Wolcott, the cat is clever. Plus I'll be going
in with expectations so low that even if it's half good I'll be
happy.
- From a few of the reviews at Rotten
Tomatoes:
"The most faithful and literal adaptation of an Alan
Moore graphic novel...a potent combination of action, emotion
and wry political commentary."
"Entertaining and solidly crafted."
Right now it's at 75%, that's a pretty good sign.
- It's driven Debbie Schlussel even
more schlussel:
UPDATE: If you had read this before and said "Wow,
there is no way that could get stupider." I'd say "Dude
you are right." But it would turn out we are wrong, she added
some more putting it right over the top, it is possibly the most
schlussel thing I have ever read and I read Schlussel every day.
The new bits are in bold.
[Note: You may perceive some of this column as a
"spoiler".]
Oh no, not some of it, all of it is crap!
If you liked the politics of last weekend's Oscar nominees,
you'll love "V for Vendetta."
Um so there are gay cowboys? Racists Los Anglicans? Gay true crime
writers? Man they really have strayed from Moore’s vision!
It's an exciting, quality Bin Laden film.
What does that mean? Well nothing really but when something
is bad it must be bin Laden!
But if you're like the rest of mainstream America--you support
our troops and believe in firmly responding to terrorists on our
own shores--then, don't waste your time at this piece of garbage
masquerading as a superhero movie. It is anything but.
Um it’s not a superhero movie… see for it to be a superhero
movie there needs to be a superhero.
If the other political films subtly whisper of an agenda, "V"
clocks you over the head with it with a still sizzling, iron frying
pan of extreme leftism. It doesn't arrive in theaters until
March 17, but already the mainstream (ie. liberal) movie critics
and entertainment media are raving about this egregious attack on
our war on terror.
Ah that explains Debbie’s serious brain damage and cartoon
like dementia.
But oh ho! It’s an extreme frying pan of leftism!
You can find it next to the moderate clever of Libertarianism over
by the hardcore commie pepper mill.
Based on the graphic novel series of the same name, "V"
comes complete with all the bogeymen the far left loves to hate:
NSA spying and wiretaps; government renditions and torture
complete with Abu Ghraib hood fashions; lecherous, elderly Christian
clerics in collars raping young girls; Islam, gay rights, and
free speech under attack; and even a Bill O'Reilly-esque evil
cable talk show host/wicked pharmaceutical billionaire/heinous
military officer combo rolled into one character.
Um I think Deb’s crazy train of thought has not only gone
off the rail but has taken hostages and demanding a bus to Cuba.
The far left hates Islam and gay rights? Why didn’t anyone
tell me?!!? The far right likes illegal wiretaps, torture, rapists
and a toleration dictatorship? Odd.
Oh, and by the way, the hero of the movie: He's a terrorist
in a Guy Fawkes mask, who blows up important government buildings.
Sound familiar?
Yeah, it’s what the real Guy Fawkes tried to do and what
OK City bomber Timothy McVeigh did. Um Deb you do know that V is
fighting a fascist dictatorship right? That he’s more a revolutionary
in line with the Founding Fathers? Wait a sec… did the stupid
asshole even see the movie?
His mask might as well be a kefiyeh wrapped around his head
in a Nick Berg video.
So the guy fighting the evil dictatorship is like Muslim terrorists?
Uh you're going to want to be very careful saying stuff like that
in GW Bush's America.
The movie takes place in futuristic England, and there is
only one American star (Natalie Portman).
Only one!!?!?!? How dare they cast a movie from a British writer
taking place in Britain with British history and landmarks with
unAmericans!!! Fuck it, time to hand the Uk over to the Germans,
someone thaw out Hitler’s brain, those tea bag sucking, wee
car wrong side of the road driving, kidney pie munchers don’t
deserve Freedom or America.
But it's quite clear to whom the "commentary" is
directed: Joe and Jane American. Lest I forget, when this movie
takes place "the United States of America" doesn't exist
anymore. America is in the midst of a civil war.
America in a civil war?!!? What kind of far out science fiction
fantasy is this thing?!?! Next you’ll have a movie suggesting
that America once enslaved people because of their skin color!
And America and the war on Iraq are the enemies--along with
Christians and the right--in this movie. We are treated to newscasts
about how "America's War" on terror spread to "our
country" (Great Britain). One character--a gay, British Jay
Leno who hosts a latenight show--keeps a secret vault of prohibited
items, including a giant poster of "the Coalition of the
Willing," depicting the American and British flags surrounding
a swastika. Think about our troops fighting and dying
in Iraq, before you decide to give your dollars to this film.
Do you really think they are Nazis?
The real America soldiers? No, the fake ones in the movie
about a future of various fascist states? Uh maybe, is that how
they're written? Fantasy? Reality? Hello?
Why don’t they just have two hours of a fetus wrapped in
a burning flag while an unseen figure pisses on a Bible and the
Constitution? It would be the same damn thing.
Also in the secret vault of sacred prohibited items: a Koran.
Portman, whose Evie is the "heroine" of "V,"
asks, why the Koran? "Are you a Muslim?" she asks the
late-night host? "No, but its [the Koran's] images are beautiful."
Then he comments about how he can be executed for possessing the
Koran.
Yeah “heroine”, pah! She’s fighting the fascist
dictatorship in an underground movement of two people hopelessly
outnumbered and outgunned. Real heroes take on corrupt
immigration officials getting rich off of NFL collectibles!
(Not a peep in this film about the thousands who've
been executed in the name of the Koran and "its beautiful
images.")
And they don’t talk about how every Muslim is a filthy
monster ready to kill all that is good and pure in America! Hell
even Deuce Bigalow II managed to squeeze in a few Islamafacist lines.
Ought to be a law, you can't make a movie unless you trash talk
any religion that Debbie doesn't like.
Puh-leeze. If anything, both Britain and the U.S. have bent
over backwards not only for the Koran, but for its extremist Muslim
followers. Where Christian displays are absolutely forbidden in
any schools, despite so-called "freedom of speech";
where Ten Commandments are removed from the Alabama Supreme Court,
despite their being the basis for our legal system; children are
required to learn about Islam, read from the Koran, and behave
as Muslims in elementary schools, in the name of "tolerance"
and "education."
Uh Deb? I know that the pictures on the big screen look all real
and stuff but it’s actually made up? See it’s fiction…
not real, like the stuff you write everyday, for example: "children
are required to learn about Islam, read from the Koran, and behave
as Muslims in elementary schools" See that's fiction... or
more accurately a crazy lie from a crazy liar.
In "V", while Islam and the Koran are treasured
but prohibited, Christianity is pure evil. We've already mentioned
the high-ranking Christian priest, who regularly rapes young girls
procured for him through an "agency." Before the priesthood,
he was an evil military officer at a hospital where political
dissident youth had experiments conducted on them for the government
(complete with Abu Ghraib-style hoods).
Yeah! Whoever heard of a priest raping children? And now that America
engages in torture, torture is no longer bad.
Nice juxtaposition, when in real life, the 19 hijackers,
the '93 WTC, U.S. Embassy, U.S.S. Cole, and British subway bombers
were hardly Christians. Hmmm . . . what religion were they? We
don't recall Mohammed Taheri-Azar, saying on Friday in his post
attempted-murder 911 call, that he tried to use his jeep to kill
Americans in the name of Jesus. No, he mentioned someone else's
name, another religion . . . which are both nowhere blasphemed
in "V."
It’s true! No one has ever killed or been killed
in the name of Christianity and Jesus. Any history book or professor
who says otherwise obviously hates Jesus, (baby and full grown)
and both should be burned at the stake like the Muslims did to the
witches in Salem.
The next three paragraphs are so stupid and bat shit crazy so please
hold on to your sanity and try not to claw your throat out while
reading it.
Then, there's the government. It's run by a religious Christian
zealot. But not just any Christian zealot.
No. Chancellor Sutler is the supreme evil Christian. In order
to get elected, he and the Bill O'Reilly-esque character arranged
for hundreds of Brits to die from chemically poisoned waters.
They claimed that terrorists did it, a story which became the
conventional wisdom. The fear that ensued garnered Sutler the
chance to rule England, along with Marshal law powers that the
English parliament gave him.
It's no coincidence that the symbol used for his
government is some sort of Cross-come-Swastika combo. Not offended
yet?
>It’s true if a Christian Fascist government came to power
their logo would be the Happy
Bunny.
Under religious Christian zealot Sutler, gays are rounded
up, imprisoned and tortured. Ditto for any dissidents, any left-wing
activists, anyone who dares speak out against or flout the Chancellor's
actions. Tell that to the ACLU, who seems to be running legal
policy in our country, these days, and its partner in crime, the
Southern Poverty Law Center, the wealthiest "public interest"
group in the U.S., to the tune of hundreds of millions. We don't
see any prospect of them being rounded up by the government, anytime
soon, unfortunately.
Under the religious Christian Chancellor, "unjust"
Gitmo-style military tribunals and absurd NSA-style wiretapping
is going on at every corner. Throughout the movie, we are shown
vans of law enforcement personnel listening in to every home.
As if that's what NSA wiretapping was about. It isn't, but "V"
drills it into you the way the ACLU wants you to see it: every
conversation in every kitchen, etc., secretly being listened in
on and laughed at by guys in sweaty, rumpled shirts and ties.
Deb…. Oh gawd you are so stupid… like so fucking
stupid I could make a basic code string that went
10 PRINT Debbie Schussel is stupid
20 goto 10
and run it on a computer that is launched into orbit and
powered by solar panels to last 20 zillion years and it still wouldn’t
be enough to describe how fucking stupid you are. Before NSA, before
the ACLU there was this book called 1984 you fucking idiot, maybe
if you read... well anything... you wouldn't be such a goddamn retard.
The evil government law enforcement chief, Creedy,
runs a meticulously ubiquitous surveillance program nationwide.
If only our FBI's Robert Mueller were so competent, we'd be safe.
Instead, he's cavorting with extremist Muslims and testified in
depositions to ignorance of the most basic newspaper facts about
Al-Qaeda.
GAH! IT’S A MOVIE, IT’S NOT REAL!!!! That’s
a basic fact you can’t seem to grasp.
Overall, the most outrageous thing about "V"
is the ending. Instead of vanquishing terror, all of Britain sides
with the terrorist hero of this movie. They celebrate his murder
of all the top officials in government, his blowing up of the
Houses of Parliament and other government buildings.
Deb, in the movie the government is the bad guy who does
many bad things, the bad guy loses. They’re child raping fascists,
they’re Big Brother, they're Hitler, they’re bin Laden
AND THEY LOSE, that’s good. Deb were you yelling at the screen
during Return of the Jedi, "The Emperor came to power legally,
those rebels are terrorists!!!"
Terrorists and terrorism are the heroes, the government
fighting them and trying to keep us safe are the enemy.
Wow. So here we are, the nut of the nut, she wants to
live in a safe world so badly that she will accept any government
that will guarantee it. I will say this and I will say this loud,
Debbie Schlussel is a sniveling coward. Great Americans say
“Give me liberty or give me death!” Debbie says “Daaaddddeeeee
watch everything I do and kill everyone who is different so the
bad people don’t get me! Moooooommmieeeeeeee look under my
bed!"
This is the glorious revolution? Osama Bin Laden
must be very proud.
I think he must be because he murdered 3,000 people, got
his holy way and a whole generation of new recruits, I image he
doesn’t give a shit about a movie.
So.
In the science fiction movie presents the impossible scenario that
a government would lie and kill for it’s own ends and then
round up various minorities and other groups they don’t like
because the in the real world the ACLU is running America's legal
system and the Southern Poverty Law Center is richer that the dreams
of Avarice. Non sequitur much?
And Deb really wants to see these people rounded up, imprisoned
and I assume tortured and murdered for reasons that she doesn't
go into but I assume it's because she doesn't like them.
And they let this crazy cow creature on TV to speak?
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